shagztoriches

Thoughts While Alone in my Room.....

2006-05-30T23:47:00.000-04:00

- I have never been a big Shaq fan. But his game has come full circle this year in the playoffs. He has accepted his role in the Heat offense. He is letting the offense run through him and making Wade, Walker and Payton better players. He is also playing better defensively than he has at any other point in his career.

- I never thought I would see the Pistons melt down the way they are in this series. When you are averaging 80 points in a series against a team like the Heat, I don't care how good you are defensively. Flip Saunders is not the problem. Prince, Billups and Hamilton need to start scoring points.

- Poker has not been going well. I made a decision to stop depositing. I'm going to keep playing freerolls, because I still like to play, but I suck something awful. I need to expand my poker library, read a little more, but it will be a while before I play seriously again. I can't really figure out what I am doing wrong and that is probably the problem.

- If the baseball gods had any sense of justice, they would have Bonds break the home run record as a DH, in a Royals uniform, at Kaufman Stadium, against the Devil Rays in front of 8,000 people. Go Barry....GO!!!

- Read a story in a back issue of Sports Illustrated today. It was about Sam Kellerman, the brother of Max Kellerman, the renowned boxing analyst and formally the host of I, Max and Around the Horn, who was brutally murdered a year ago by a boxer he befriended and was tryng to help out. I highly recommend you take a look at it. Sam and Max came from a tremendous family, all very talented, and he was taken before he was able to make his mark. It's in the April 17th issue.

- 57 days until the first NFL training camp. Ahh....fall bliss.

Open Letter from a Fat Man to his Penis

2006-05-16T01:21:00.000-04:00

Dear Penis,

Because I have not seen you since I was ten, I wanted to send this to you so you would know I have not forgotten about you. You are the first place I wash when I shower.That must count for something. You have opened my eyes to the challenges of others. After our "intimate moments", I know how Stevie Wonder feels when he plays the piano. You are also a real trooper when I find a girl who will actually sleep with me. We may look like a hippo humping a 350 pound oompa loompa, but you are always able to hold up your end of the bargain.I'd like to tip my cap to my red helmuted mushroom warrior, or that's what I think you look like. Though unseen, you are not forgotten.

Yours Truly,
The Fat Man

A Different NFL Mock Draft..

2006-04-18T01:53:00.000-04:00

I'm reading through all the NFL mock drafts and I thought of this neat little exercise. For one round only, if you could bring back any player in their team's history that you can bring back in their prime that would immediately help their team, who would it be? Here is how I see it.

Houston Texans This is a team with a lot of needs and a short history. However, we'll pick out of a pool of old Oilers players. Since we know Reggie Bush is going to be a Texan, let's go defense. I'll take Elvin Bethea. He was an 8 time pro bowl defensive lineman, and the mark of a good defense always starts at the line of scrimmage.

New Orleans Saints The Saints may be getting better very quickly this year. They have always had talent, but they have lacked the leadership and experience to win the big game. I would bring in Sam Mills. Offensively they will put up numbers with Brees, McAllister, and Sean Payton calling the plays. Sam would be another coach out in the field, and a leader in the locker room.

Tennessee Titans With an aging Steve McNair, and a young quarterback in their future, I think bringing in Bruce Matthews would be a perfect way to start rebuilding. You always start the rebuilding process from the line of scrimmage, and Bruce Matthews is about as good as they come.

New York Jets This one is almost too easy. Joe Namath is a no brainer. Just keep him away from hard liquor and Susie Kolber.

Green Bay Packers So many needs here. If Brett Favre retires, bring in......Brett Favre from 1996. If he comes back, bring back James Lofton. Javon Walker is just about out of there, and an aging Donald Driver will not get the job done. I wouldn't argue with possibly bringing back and offensive lineman from the sixties to create a seal here, and a seal here.

San Francisco 49ers This team is a fucking mess. To get this team on track, you need a guy to instill the right attitude. I like Mike Nolan but he has no one to carry his message on the field. Ronnie Lott and his nine fingers would be a good start.

Oakland Raiders The biggest need on this team is in the defensive backfield. There are so many options, but a shutdown corner makes this team 10 times better. Lester Hayes was the best 1 on 1 coverage corner I've ever seen.

Buffalo Bills There are two players that popped into mind almost immediately. I think will go defense and take Bruce Smith, and hope Willis McGahee runs for 1800 yards.

Detroit Lions Can Steve Yzerman play quarterback? No you say? Well, I guess we'll go with Billy Sims by default. And I thought being an Eagles fan was bad.

Arizona Cardinals If you give Kurt Warner time and Edgerrin James some holes, you are looking at a great offense. I would say Conrad Dobler, but let's go with Dan Dierdorf, just so we don't have to listen to him in the booth anymore.

Saint Louis Rams Another no brainer. Deacon Jones, but you need to legalize the head slap first.

Cleveland Browns Jim Brown left. Jim Brown right. I wish I was alive when he played.

Baltimore Ravens I am going to pick from the Baltimore Colts pool. Get out the high top cleats and the high and tight hair do. I just hope Brian Billick's ego could handle Unitas calling his own game.

Philadelphia Eagles I should go with Reggie White, but we (I mean they) have an immediate need at wide receiver. Mike Quick would be perfect with McNabb.

Denver Broncos With all due respect to Jake the Snake, John Elway would have won the Super Bowl last year, and he would win it this year.

Atlanta Falcons Hmmm, tough one here. Maybe we'll look at wide receiver here. Bad moon Rison? No thanks. Lets take Alfred Jenkins.He was the number one receiver on one of the most underrated offensive teams in the last 30 years.

Miami Dolphins If I was doing this in January, I'd say Dan Marino. But with Culpepper, Ronnie Brown and Chris Chambers, I think Larry Little would be needed to anchor the offensive line.

Minnesota Vikings This is another team that needs an identity and leadership on defense. Let's take Jim Marshall. Just make sure he runs the right way when he recovers a fumble.

Dallas Cowboys Just trying to think how to make this team better makes me sick. But, I will stay professional here and go with Emmitt Smith. I feel so dirty.

San Diego Chargers I would say Dan Fouts, but let's give Rivers a shot. A lot of options at receiver, one of my favorites was John Jefferson. I wouldn't argue if you said Charley Joiner, Wes Chandler or Lance Alworth. If Jefferson would of stayed healthy, and stayed in San Diego, he would be a hall of famer.

Kansas City Chiefs Let's get them some defensive line help. Buck Buchanan would be a nice fit.

New England Patriots They have been decimated on the offensive line. John Hannah would be a great start to bringing this group back to prominence, and to doing commercials.

Tampa Bay Buccaneers Not much to choose from here. I'm not sold on Chris Simms, so let's bring back Doug Williams. He may have won a Super Bowl in Washington, but his best years were in Tampa.

Cincinnati Bengals That offensive line would look great with Willie Anderson at RT, and Anthony Munoz at LT. Palmer would throw for 4500 yards on one leg with that kind of protection.

New York Giants I'm feeling sick again. I guess Lawrence Taylor, but you would have to shackle him to his hotel room the night before the game.

Chicago Bears Walter Payton. End. Of. Discussion.

Carolina Panthers I guess I didn't think this through. They could use help at tight end. Wesley Walls. Why the fuck not. It's getting late.

Jacksonville Jaguars Tony Boselli.would anchor that line for the injury plagued back field of Byron Leftwich and Fred Taylor.

Indianapolis Colts They don't deserve a Baltimore Colt. Eric Dickerson is the best I'll do, and that's not bad.

Seattle Seahawks Steve Largent. Who else is there?

Pittsburgh Steelers They have to fill a need at the number two slot at wide receiver. So lets take the second best number two wide receiver of all time (next to John Taylor), that is John Stallworth.

A New Beginning....

2006-04-04T19:01:00.000-04:00

Baseball was a bigger deal to me when I was younger. Like many Americans, the baseball strike was the final straw for me, and "America's Pastime" has become nothing more than a Sportscenter highlight. In 1981, I could of told you the starting rotation for the Kansas City Royals, the leadoff hitter for the Indians, and the 4th outfielder for the Mariners. Today, I'm not sure if I can give you a name of one Royal, Indian or an Mariner. But there is one part of baseball that has stuck with me for the 32 years that I have been on Earth, and that is "Opening Day". Everyone from a Devil Ray fan to a Yankee fan has the same hopes and aspirations on opening day. For me it cleanses the soul and signifies a new beginning. You forget you're watching overpriced, physically and mentally inflated, petulant children and hone in on the one pure element those assholes can never take away from the game. Balls and Strikes. Sac Flies and Double Plays. Infield Hits and Doubles hit down the left field line. Sliding into home or making a diving catch. You are more aware of the game itself, and less aware of the controversial whirlwind. I took the day off yesterday and pretended I was that 8 year old kid in 1981 that knew the game inside and out. I watched four full games yesterday, and I'm not sure if I'll watch 4 full games the rest of the year. But I woke up this morning with a sense of purpose and hope. Getting a sense of a "New Beginning" will have that effect. Maybe baseball can persevere and become that game I knew and loved.

Tidbits

- As you probably have gathered, I don't read too many blogs. I have a short attention span, and unless something grabs me immediately, I usually click and move on. However, I started reading this blog called Redpill's Poker Journey". It's the funniest god damn thing I ever read. If the author is actually making up these things about his life, than it is pure genius. If he isn't, than it is pathetic and sad. The comments that people leave for this guy are sometimes funnier than the posts. You have to check this out.

- The Tennessee Titans have to be the losers of the month for their unwarranted treatment of Steve McNair this week. After ten years of service and playing through every injury known to man, they sent him home from their offseason conditioning program until he reworks his contract. You always hear players say, when asked about contract negotiations, that it's not personal and always business. It has to be personal in a case like this. This is a guy that has been a productive player, a good teammate, and a model citizen. The Titans should be ashamed of themselves.

- The Sixers will finish the season 5 to 8 games under five hundred, and go into next season owing Iverson 17 million, Webber 20 million, Dalembert 10 million, Greg Buckner 6 million (hasn't played here in almost 3 years), Mashburn 10 million and Todd McCullough about 6 or 7 million ( although insurance covers the pay of both Mash and McCullough because of retirement, there is still a percentage against the cap). If the Sixers G.M. Billy King still has a job next year with this team, than he must have pictures of Sixers president Ed Snider eating a carrot out of a midget's ass (sorry, I meant to say "little people") It's not like Ed Snider is new to the sports scene, he owned the Flyers from the late 60's up until about 10 years ago. I'm not sure why he feels loyal to this guy, but the longer he waits, the worse this team is going to get.

- Oh No!!! Barry Bonds is going to pass the Babe!! Oh No!! He's only 45 homers from catching Aaron. It's a catastrophe!! What are we going to do???? You know what you'll do? Nothing. Zilch. Zip. Why in the hell do people care about these records anyway. Anyone who loses sleep over this has bigger problems in life. I don't care if he's a fucking prick. I don't care if he took Testosterone, Methadone, Vicodin, Horse Tranquilizers, Beaver Tranquilizers, Rhino Sperm, or any bodily fluid that discharges from Rosie O'Donnell. You want to know about the Barry Bonds stat I care about? How many championships has Barry won?........answer......0!!! To me, the media is making a big deal out of a stats stuffer with a piss poor attitude that has no regard for his teammates, his organization, his league, and most importantly his fans. Breaking that record takes nothing away from the accomplishments of Ruth or Aaron because they will always have 1 milestone Barry will never get to, that is a world championship. Wait a minute, he got close once right? Well, you can put that under his plaque in Cooperstown.

My Poker Mission Statement (Yes I still play poker)

2006-03-02T02:38:00.000-05:00

I stated in a previous post that I have not been playing much poker lately. The reason being, I am not a winning poker player. I know a lot of people will post about all their big scores, and I've had one or two, but overall I am in the majority of people that play online poker and come out losing in the end. I took a long look at my play and realized that my actual poker skills aren't necessarily the problem. Not that I'm a great player, but I can hold my own. My biggest problem has been game selection. For example, I would deposit fifty bucks into Pokerstars, than throw myself into a $11 rebuy tournament, or a $20 180 person sit and go, and I'd piss it away in a day or two. I'd play these games because I am trying to recreate the big score I hit about a year ago in a $30 rebuy on Paradise. After winning $4000 playing for anything less, in my mind, seemed senseless. Just so you know I am not depositing my car payment into my bankroll. I have a decent job, and $50 a week doesn't really hurt me. But it does start to add up. I took the time away from poker to get refocused. I wanted to figure out what I want out of playing poker and, is it attainable? After some reflection, I have come to the conclusion that I play because:

A. I love the game.
B. I like the social interactions.
C. Feeds my competitive spirit.
D. Provides me with a secondary income

So after reading some books and hitting some poker forums, I have become comfortable with the small victories that will come with beating that games that I can play with my bankroll. I have been back playing for a week and I have already doubled my bankroll, just by playing $6 turbo sit and goes at Stars. Poker has become more fun in the last week than it has been in the year and a half prior. I think I have finally seen the big picture, and hope to be a "winning player".

And by the way, the million dollar tourney I got into through the satellite didn't turn out so good. I went out when I picked up a bluff all in with 9-9 with a J high board. The player turned over k-8 os. K hit the turn. Back to the grind I go!

I'm going to Vegas for the first time for a buddy's bachelor party in 2 weeks. I'm not planning to play much poker, but I will sit down during one of my sober moments (hopefully) at a card table just to say that I did. Most of my time will likely be spent at the sports book betting on March Madness. I'll have a report on that, and I also have to put down a story about the Wing Bowl. I'm sure the anticipation is killing you. :)

I am still in shock...

2006-02-19T22:16:00.000-05:00

I just won a seat to the 1,000,000 guaranteed tournament at Pokerstars. If I last to the first break, I'll be in shock. During the satellite, after the second break, I cracked King's when I tripped my pocket tens on the turn. Other than that, I was making good reads and I was pushing at the right time. I actually felt comfortable playing. I think taking a month off has really helped. I'll take some notes while I'm playing the big tournament and let you know how I do. Maybe I'll post some hourly updates.

Oh and while I'm thinking about it, how the fuck do you get this Pokerstars blogger commercial off my blog. It's driving me nuts. If anyone is reading this and has a clue, let me know, would be highly appreciated!

Hello Again!!

2006-02-08T01:08:00.000-05:00

I guess you are all wondering where I have been for the last two months.......just kidding nobody reads this fucking blog. Just in case you have stumbled across this and are wondering, I really haven't had much to say. I have been on hiatus with poker, and football has been way too depressing to write about. The bright spot has been PSU, but again, what does beating FSU mean? The Noles played much better than expected, they should be really good next year, but how can you feel good about beating a team the was arguably the 3rd or 4th best team in their conference for most of the year? But I guess this year I'll take it.The Eagles are on a downward spiral. I have been in McNabb's corner all season. He had an opportunity to establish himself as the leader of this team, but that ESPN interview was just atrocious. TO is gone Donny Mac, no reason to drudge those problems up now, then call out your teammates for their play. I know you were hurt, but you weren't exactly the second coming of Joe Montana this year. I understand you have been put through a lot with the fans, and the local and national media, but the reason the front office has set you up financially for the rest of your life is because YOU ARE SUPPOSED TO BE ABOVE THIS PETTY BULLSHIT!!! This team is slipping away by the second, you need to put out this fire YOU started and get behind the core players on this team. Get me a Super Bowl damnit!! Well anyway, I feel a little better now. I want to do a post looking at March Madness, but I'd like to do a little more research and break down the teams I think will be dangerous in the tournament. I also have a story about being at wing bowl, which is a tradition here in Philly. Drinking beer and looking at boobs at 6:30am merits some space on this horrible blog. Talk to you soon.

PS..Todd if your reading this, you were right, the '84 Niners still are the best team of all time. My argument apparently holds no water!! And if anyone other than Todd is still reading, click on his site to the left and check it out (Toddcommish). It's my favorite blog, and worth checking out.

WPT and Bowl Games

2005-12-23T18:53:00.000-05:00

First I would like to offer my deepest condolences to Tony Dungy and his family. I lost a brother about 5 years ago, and I know there has been a change in not only my brothers and sisters and me, but even more so with my parents. The fact that Tony's son died of an apparent suicide makes this even harder to swallow. The Dungys will be in my thoughts this holiday season.

I came across an article on ESPN poker club about the most recent WPT event being held in Las Vegas at the Bellagio. It was reported that Chris "Jesus" Ferguson and Andy Bloch refused to sign the waiver. Their issue seems to be with how their likenesses are being used, with Ferguson taking issue with his likeness being used in a video game. Apparently, he has signed on for his own video game (Oooh, I'm sure it will be different). I came across a quote from Barry Greenstein (I am not his biggest fan) who I think put this in perspective: "We were all degenerate gamblers until TV came along, and now we got made into celebrities and we're complaining to the people who made us marketable and famous that they don't want them to show us anymore without our approval.'' Here is my take on this. First off , who the fuck is Andy Bloch, and who is fighting for the use his likeness? Secondly, and most importantly, the medium where these tournaments are played will always be bigger than the players. The poker show you are watching is a cross between reality TV and a game show (hmm...outwit...outplay...outlast...sounds familiar). The well known poker players are important pieces, but what really makes these shows are the Chris Moneymakers, the Joe Hachems, the common man who walks off the street and wins an insane amount of money. You look at these TV shows on the game show network that puts on nothing but pros, and nobody cares! And these professionals are going to turn around and bite the hand that feeds them? You can go to any $10/$20 No Limit game at a Vegas Casino and grab some drunk fuck, throw a Full Tilt jersey on him, tell the TV audience he is a pro, and he instantly becomes just as marketable as Andy Bloch, Chris Ferguson, or John Juanda. If it wasn't for this medium, most of these "celebrity poker players" would be broke, grinding their way through a 6/12 Limit game. If you are not one of the elite players in the world (Doyle, Chip, Ivey, etc.), you better hope and pray to God that ESPN and the Travel Channel find these tournaments marketable enough to keep putting them on. Go out and get it while the getting is still good, because the poker boom's 15 minutes will eventually be up.

Oh Nelly, It's Bowl Season!!

It is the most wonderful time of the year, or at least that's what Andy Williams and the sponsors for the Capital One Bowl Week would have you think.While there are a fair share of pitiful fucking games (Houston vs Kansas...come on now!!), there are some interesting matchups you might want to look for in the next 2 weeks.

Insight Bowl Arizona St. vs Rutgers Dec 26th 8pm

Okay, this could be seen as a shitty game. I just wanted to give props to Greg Schiano and the Scarlet Knights for making their first bowl appearance in 27 years. The last bowl game they played was the Garden State bowl, which oddly enough is the last bowl game Temple went to 26 years ago. Rutgers does have a really good offense, but ASU might lay 70 on this team. Score 62-38.

Alamo Bowl Michigan vs Nebraska Dec 27th 8pm

What a game this would have been 10 years ago. This is a game with 2 teams who have improved as the year went on, and are looking forward to big years the following season. Both teams sport strong defenses and inconsistent play on offense, but I'll give the nod to RB Michael Hart and the Wolverines 24-17.

Holiday Bowl (6)Oregon vs Oklahoma Dec 29th 8pm

Oregon fans are not happy about this game. I sympathize, but did you really expect the pollsters to keep Notre Dame out of the BCS. The fact that I can only tell you they have the ugliest uniforms in the college football should give you an idea as to why Oregon is in this game. Hey, at least you guys don't have to pump your own gas. Since I know nothing about Oregon, I will use the Dwayne Nelson (from "What's Happening") full proof betting formula. Okay, got it. Oregon wins 1,676-438. Take the over.

Sun Bowl Northwestern vs UCLA Dec 30th 2pm

These are two of the most exciting teams in college football today. All offense, zero defense, I love these games. Both teams have superb Quarterback play, great running backs, and the worst defenses in the country. Not to trot out an old cliche', but whoever has the ball last will win this game. Final score 63-57, and the winner will be, (eenneyy-meeneey-mineeey-mo, catch a doggie by his toe, if he hollers let him go, eenneyy-meeneey-mineeey mo) UCLA.

Peach Bowl (9)Miami (Fla) vs (10)LSU Dec 30th 7:30pm

2 of the most overrated teams in college football meet. Both offenses are inconsistent, and both have great defenses that seem to fold under pressure. I'll take LSU 14-13, only because I have to pick a winner. Wake me up when it's over.

Fiesta Bowl (5)Notre Dame vs (4)Ohio State Jan 2nd 4:30pm

I will admit this might be the most interesting matchup of the year, even though Penn State got screwed out of a game with one of these teams. More on that later. It is Notre Dame's high powered offense against Ohio State's vaunted defense. Those Notre Dame receivers are just sick. Maurice Stovall , number 21 in your programs (Philly Guy) reminds me of Larry Fitzgerald, and Jeff Samard...Samart...he's the tall white kid wearing number 83, is a deep threat. Nobody runs an offense more efficiently in college football this year than Brady Quinn. Can Ohio State answer the bell on defense? As long as Ohio State's offense keeps them off the field, they can. Score 28-21 Ohio State.

Sugar Bowl (11)W. Virginia vs. (8)Georgia Jan 2nd 8:30pm

The only reason to watch this game is to watch D.J. Shockley. He has been off my radar this year, but I am looking forward to watching him play. Other than that, it's a meaningless game pitting two teams that do not deserve the national spotlight. *yawn*. Georgia 45-20.

Orange Bowl (3)Penn State vs (22)Florida State Jan 3rd 8pm

You have the number three team in the country, one second from being undefeated, and running away with what is arguably the most competetive conference in the nation, and PSU gets Florida State. It's a no win situation. Who gives a shit if PSU beats FSU, they beat a team with 4 losses. 4 FUCKING LOSSES!!! The number three team in the nation should garner a tad bit more respect. They should of put together FSU and W. Virginia, and let them fight it out for the worst team in the BCS and give the Nits Georgia. At least then the win would mean something. PSU 48-17.

Rose Bowl (1)USC vs (2)Texas Jan 4th 8pm

The most high powered offense in NCAA history takes on the most dynamic player in the last 25 years in what is being termed as the game of the century...that is until next year. Texas boasts an extremely talented defense, that might be a moot point, considering that , in my opinion, half of the NFL would have problems matching up with USC's offense, much less Texas. I think Texas will keep it close for a half, but a fresh USC defense will capitalize on a mistake and the USC offense will blow them out of the water. USC 56-34.

.

Fantasy Football Championship

2005-12-19T22:53:00.000-05:00

For the third time in four years, I have made the championship game in my fantasy league. That's the good news. The bad news is, I have Peyton Manning and Marvin Harrison. They had to drop that fucking game didn't they? Well, this puts me in quite the quandry. Do I take a chance and see if they can put up numbers in one half, or do I turn to David Gerrard and "Well-Dressed" Amani Toomer? Seattle is in the bottom half in pass defense, so there is a real good chance that we could see a possible long touch down pass, and that alone would put me over the top. I think I need to go with Manning and Harrison. I also have Rudy Johnson, and he should run apeshit this weekend against Buffalo, who happens to have the worst run defense in the league. My second running back is a question mark, as Michael Bennett didn't excactly have his best game of the year, and he faces a Ravens defense that looks pretty fucking good tonight against the Pack. I picked up Aaron Stecker this week. He did have 100 all purpose yards last week, and he is facing a Lions defense at home who is just going through the motions. I have a similar problem with my second receiver. I plugged in Koren Robinson two weeks ago, and he has been very steady. However, just like Bennett, he faces a tough matchup against the Ravens. I do have Toomer, but I am not real happy with his match-up against the Redskins, who are in the top half in passing defense. There is one pick up that I can make that does intrigue me, and that is Derrick Mason. This is a guy that has 800 yards receiving with two of the worst quarterbacks in the NFL. Boller looks like something clicking tonight in this offense, but the problem is he's clicking mostly with Todd Heap. Mason has three catches for about 50 yards. They are playing Minnesota who is 25th in pass defense. I may not make my mind up until Friday.

Is Online Poker Rigged?

2005-12-15T23:12:00.000-05:00

If you have been on 2+2, paid attention to the chat box at a poker game, or read any online poker forum, I'm sure that you would be more than familiar with the arguments on both sides to this question. You have heard terms like "Riverstars", "only at Paradise", etc., etc. I have been playing online poker for about a year and a half, and to be completely honest, part of me has said "Wow, that guy has caught a two outer the last three hands he has been in a pot. How the fuck is that possible". Being of sound mind I would say there is no way online poker is rigged. But I would be lying if I said I have not had weak moments where I have turned over to the other side. Tonight I experienced one of my weaker moments. I was in a $20 multi table tourney on www.Bugsysclub.com and I was on a final table 7 handed. I will present three hands that happened withing 5 minutes of each other, with 10 hands played during that span. I will put the percentages next to each player as the cards are dealt. Keep in mind however, these are short stacks vs. big stacks.

3,000 Pu-238 folds
CaseyJones folds
anthrolizard raises 6,000 to 9,000
Jazzdog folds
newmon calls 9,000
capt.kirk folds
Spiegel folds
Jimmy19 folds
WillEpm folds
shag773 folds
>>>DEALING FLOP<<< [ 4s Jh Tc ]
anthrolizard bets 21,000 and is all-in
newmon calls 21,000
anthrolizard cards were Ad Ah 76%
newmon cards were Jc Kc 24%
>>>DEALING TURN<<<
[ Ks ]
Ad Ah 27%
Kc Jc 73%
>>>DEALING RIVER<<<
[ Kh ]
newmon wins 69,500 with a full house, kings full of jacks
anthrolizard has left the table
anthrolizard finishes in 10th place

capt.kirk folds
Spiegel folds
Jimmy19 folds
WillEpm folds
shag773 folds
Pu-238 folds
CaseyJones calls 3,000
Jazzdog calls 1,500
newmon checks
>>>DEALING FLOP<<< [ 3d 2h 5d ]
Jazzdog bets 13,500
newmon folds CaseyJones raises 22,000 to 35,500 and is all-in Jazzdog calls 22,000 CaseyJones cards were 7d 7s 65%
Jazzdog cards were Ad 3h 35%
>>>DEALING TURN<<<
[ Ah ]
>>>DEALING RIVER<<<
[ 3s ]
Jazzdog wins 84,500 with a full house, threes full of aces
CaseyJones has left the table
CaseyJones finishes in 9th place

capt.kirk folds
Spiegel folds
Jimmy19 folds
WillEpm folds
shag773 raises 3,000 to 6,000
Jazzdog folds
newmon raises 80,000 to 86,000 and is all-in
shag773 calls 12,500 and is all-in
newmon takes back 67,500
newmon cards were 8s Ad 28%
shag773 cards were Ks Kc 72%
>>>DEALING FLOP<<<
[ Qc Js Kh ]
Ks Kc 86%
8s Ad 14%
>>>DEALING TURN<<<
[ Td ]
shag773: gg
>>>DEALING RIVER<<< [ 4s ] newmon wins 42,000 with an ace high straight shag773 has left the table shag773 finishes in 7th place Jazzdog: gg Jimmy19: gg WillEpm: gg

I did not post this as a standard bad beat rant, but to raise a question. I'm sure you all have been at the end of a tournament and seen a stretch like this where small stacks are being knocked off one at a time being a 2 to 1, 3 to 1, or 4 to 1 favorite. My question isn't simply "is online poker rigged?", but rather, is there any inherent advantage for an online site to remove short stacks and shorten the length of a tournament? I am not intelligent enough to run through these numbers and tell you one way or another, but I can tell you that this is a question I have posed to myself on numerous occasions. Have you asked yourself this? If you have, what have you concluded? Or, is this just "poker" and this theory holds no water. I would be interested on people's take on this, because I know I am not the only one that has noticed this. My take is, 95% of the time I feel as though I am in a square game with a random deal. The other 5% of the time, I am teetering on the fence.

Also, if you are an NFL fan I welcome you to read my previous post about how I see the Colt's place in history versus some of the greatest teams of all time. I will post about how I see the playoffs shaking out after this weekend's game, and a college bowl preview.

How to turn one cent into 35 dollars

2005-12-12T23:36:00.000-05:00

For anyone that has stumbled upon these humble blog, you may have noted that I am my worst critic. There is nothing that pisses me off more than when my poker play is off. Normally I don't blame the other players, the site's rng, or the poker gods, I blame myself for making poor decisions. Well, let me be the first to pat myself on the back for my recent play. To set the scene, I am at the first site I ever played real money poker at (www.bugsysclub.com) last Friday night. I notice I have .01 left in my account. Believe it or not, Bugsys is the only site I know of that has a .01 buy-in tourney. Well, as luck would have it, it was just about to start, and my Friday night was free (I am such a fucking loser). It is a standard turbo tournament, but you start with T5000. Also, as you can imagine, you are not exactly playing against the stiffest competition in the world. Much to my surprise, I was able to outlast 228 of the worst players known to man to win the tourney with a net profit of $6.72 cents. It took about three hours, and to be honest, I didn't even break a sweat. My hands surprisingly held up, and my opponents were fairly easy to read. It was my first tournament win in a real money tourney (if you can call it that) and I was pretty fucking geeked. I take my new found winnings into a $2 sit and go. I win that sittie in under an hour, again not really breaking a sweat, pulling in a $9 profit ballooning my bankroll to $15 dollars. If I had a girlfriend, we would be living ghettofabulous at the country buffet. However, since I'm single and bored, I press my luck and pop into a $5 sittie. I think you are starting to see the pattern here. I take first, pulling in a $19.50 profit, giving me a monster bankroll of 35 dollars. I thought about withdrawing that money and taking my chances at the big game in the Bellagio, but I'm not sure I could withstand the embarrassment of looking at Chip Reese's face as I open the betting with $34.50 (I'll tip the guard to let me in). In the immortal words of George Costanza "I'm back baby!".

Thoughts on the NFL, and whatever pops in my head

Watching the Colts play this Sunday, it occurred to me that I may be watching the greatest football team of all time. Well, it didn't just occur to me, but I couldn't help but think who could be better than the Colts at this point. Granted, they still have a Super Bowl to win, but anyone who thinks that there is a team out there that can stay with the Colts has to stop huffing the keyboard cleaner. Let' s break down some of the best teams of all time, and you come to your own conclusion.

San Francisco 49ers (1981-1994)
This is a team that is loaded with Hall of Fame offensive players. Joe Montana was the best there is, the best there was, and the best there ever will be. The same holds true for Jerry Rice. Steve Young picked up where Montana left off. John Taylor was the best second receiver ever to play the game. Bill Walsh is the greatest offensive mind in NFL history. The offensive line is underrated, but when you have a quarterback that gets rid of the ball in 3.5 seconds every play, it does make life easier. The defense is also underrated, with Ronnie Lott as the best corner in the league, than later becoming a hall of famer as the best safety of all time. You also had Pierce Holt, Charles Haley and later Ken Norton Jr holding down the fort in the front seven. Were they underrated? Yes they were. Were the dominant? No, they were not. They did enough to give Montana and Young a chance to win, but you can't really point at a big playoff game or Super Bowl and say that they stepped up and won that game. Granted, they didn't have to, but the point remains the same. The Colts have the best defense right now in football. I don't put this Colts team in the same historical league as the Niners, but judging the Niners best season against what the Colts are doing now, the Colts are far and away better than the Niners. If the Colts win three out of the next four bowls, I give the Colts the historical edge.

Pittsburgh Steelers (1974-1979)
The Steel Curtain defense will go down in history as the greatest defense of all time. It's not even close. Mean Joe Green, Jack Lambert, Jack Ham, Mel Blount, were all just as tenacious against the run as they were against the pass. Terry Bradshaw finally put things together offensively in 1974 by limiting mistakes and grudgingly playing under the offensive system to put these guys over the hump. They also had the best offensive line of the decade. They are loaded with hall of famers Franco Harris, Lynne Swan, and John Stallworth. Again, I will not compare the whole body of work against the Colts, the Steelers clearly have the nod there. But taking their best season, let's say 1975, do you put that up against the 2005 Colts? I think it's close. The Colts this year are just as dominate this year as the Steelers were in 1975 defensively, I'll make that a push. Offensively, I think the Colts a far and away a better football team. I'm not sure that Bradshaw ever garnered the same respect from his team that Peyton Manning has with his. Granted, this is not cut and dry, but for my money, give me the Colts.

Chicago Bears (1985)
Before this year, this was the most dominate football team I had ever seen. The defense was just ridiculous. I know I said the Steel Curtain was the best, which they are, but for a single season, there has never been a defense that was better (the 1991 Eagles are a close second). However, offensively this team had many question marks other than Walter Payton, who is the best football player of my time. Jim McMahon is a good quarterback who actually had a sharp football mind(while on the field) and managed the game well. However, the guy could not stay healthy enough to finish a game. The offensive line was unbelievable. The wide receivers were suspect at best, Willie Gault and Dennis Gentry did enough do get the job done. The Colts can beat you on either side of the ball. I can't say that about the 1985 Bears.

Miami Dolphins (1971-1974)
This is where it gets a little tricky for me. I can't say that I actually saw that Dolphin team in their heyday. I did get to watch a Steelers game or two in the late seventies, but I only caught this Dolphin team when they were a shell of themselves in the late seventies and into 1980. I could throw stats at you and make my argument there, but it wouldn't be fair to this team. But, I think their winning percentage speaks for itself. The only point I will bring up is that the landscape of the NFL was much different in 1972 than it is now. The league as it stands now is built towards parity, while the system in 1972 was more suited towards building a dynasty. That being said, if the Colts run the table and win the Super Bowl, they will displace what the Dolphins did in 1972 as the greatest feat in NFL history. If you don't believe me, ask them.

Well, there you have it. You may be wondering, "Hey, what about the 1967-1968 Packers?". My hands are cramping up and I have work in the morning. I will say this, all of my points are contingent on the Colts winning the Super Bowl, so that will be a caveat to this post. But, I don't think I have much to worry about there.

WSOP Final Table Thoughts, Football Picks

2005-11-17T17:54:00.000-05:00

WSOP

The final table was probably the most dramatic television event of the year. It made Survivor look like Cop Rock. I have to hand it to Mike Matusow, you can say what you want about his table demeanor and his personal issues, he was the only player at that table who wanted that bracelet more than the money. The guy played his ass off, and got sucked out after making a tremendous read after the flop. You may not like him, but you sure as hell have to respect him. Scott Lazer had two of the biggest meltdowns in televised poker history, pushing with K-(junk) and Q-10 os, going in both times way behind and predictably busting out . Going on tilt because you would have turned quads after making the correct pre-flop fold is weak. He got what he deserved. And Joe Hachem, he was short stacked the whole way but came back to become your world champion. I know what I saw was basically a highlight show, but what I did see of Joe did not really impress me. He was a tight, aggressive player who caught some cards at the right time and got lucky when he didn't. You didn't really see him make a tremendous read or a really huge laydown. He may have, but it was either not shown or I missed it while getting busted out of a Pokerstars sittie. At any rate, I guess it's good for poker because you will now get even more new players in online and brick and mortar card rooms. But, as I have alluded to before, when the fish(the maniacal "it worked because I saw it on TV assholes, not the loose passive assholes) substantially outnumber the sharks, it's like stepping into a fucking minefield. Maybe I'll play Madden for a while, at least there I can go online and get pummeled and not go broke!

FOOTBALL THOUGHTS AND PICKS

Let me start off by saying I am physically ill over what transpired last Monday night. How do you give up a 2 touchdown lead with 4 minutes left to go in the game? I'll be honest with you, I haven't taken a loss this hard since we lost to Carolina two years ago. Would you like an idea of what I am going through? Like it or not, you are going to understand right now. You must all suffer as I have. So, as your penance, here is a soccer article, in French. Enjoy!

Mondial de foot: l'Allemagne attend son plateau de prestigejeu 17 nov, 18h18

PARIS (AFP) - Le BrÃ©sil de Ronaldinho, la France de Zidane, l'Argentine de Crespo, l'Angleterre de Beckham, les Pays-Bas de Van Nistelrooy: la 18e Ã©dition de la Coupe du monde de football dÃ©butera dans un peu plus de six mois en Allemagne (9 juin-9 juillet) avec un vrai plateau de prestige.
Tous les anciens vainqueurs du Mondial seront prÃ©sents, sauf l'Uruguay, et Ã l'exception du Camerounais Samuel Eto'o, de l'Irlandais Roy Keane, du Turc Hakan Sukur et du Roumain Adrian Mutu, tous les plus grands joueurs de la planÃ¨te foot fouleront les pelouses allemandes, sauf blessure ou suspension.
D'ici au match d'ouverture, le 9 juin Ã Munich, rendez-vous est pris le 9 dÃ©cembre Ã Leipzig (Allemagne) pour le tirage au sort de la phase finale.
. NÃ©ophytes: Togo, CÃ´te d'Ivoire, Ghana, Angola pour l'Afrique, TrinitÃ©-et-Tobago pour la Concacaf et Ukraine pour l'Europe disputeront la premiÃ¨re Coupe du monde de leur histoire. A l'inverse, les grands -ou rÃ©putÃ©s tels- ont rÃ©pondu prÃ©sent, surtout en Europe, alors que les Pays-Bas Ã©taient absents en 2002, le Portugal en 1998, la France et l'Angleterre en 1994.
. Afrique: les gÃ©ants Ã terre. Cameroun, Nigeria, Maroc, Afrique du sud, SÃ©nÃ©gal... Les gÃ©ants africains sont tous passÃ©s Ã la trappe, sauf la Tunisie, laissant place Ã des pays Ã©mergents sur le continent noir, Togo, CÃ´te d'Ivoire, Ghana et Angola, prÃ©sents pour la premiÃ¨re fois Ã une Coupe du monde. Dans un tournoi oÃ¹ l'expÃ©rience est primordiale, l'Afrique risque d'avoir du mal Ã maintenir un reprÃ©sentant jusqu'en quart de finale.
. Europe: la Turquie tombe de haut. Du podium du Mondial asiatique en 2002 (3e) Ã l'Ã©limination pure et simple en 2006, la chute est rude pour la Turquie, dÃ©jÃ non qualifiÃ©e pour l'Euro-2004. Une page se tourne peu-Ãªtre pour le football turc, dans la foulÃ©e d'un Hakan Sukur qui a annoncÃ© sa retraite. La GrÃ¨ce, pourtant championne d'Europe en 2004, a imitÃ© son "ennemi" turc.

Tobago pour le Mondial-2006 face Ã BahreÃ¯n, le 16 novembre 2005 Ã Manama
agrandir la photo
. Amsud: L'Uruguay sera le seul des sept pays dÃ©jÃ sacrÃ©s champions du monde Ã ne pas Ãªtre prÃ©sent en Allemagne. Les six autres pays dÃ©jÃ vainqueurs de la Coupe du monde, BrÃ©sil (1958, 1962, 1970, 1994, 2002), Italie (1934, 1938, 1982), Allemagne (1954, 1974, 1990), Argentine (1978, 1986), Angleterre (1966) et France (1998) seront eux prÃ©sents Ã la 18e Coupe du monde.
. BrÃ©sil favori: Ã six mois du dÃ©but de la compÃ©tition, le BrÃ©sil fait figure de grand favori. En plus de son compartiment offensif Ã faire peur, avec Ronaldinho, Ronaldo, Adriano, Kaka, Robinho et consorts, la SeleÃ§ao prÃ©sente, chose inhabituelle, une arriÃ¨re garde de qualitÃ©: Roque Junior, Lucio et Juan sont de niveau mondial en charniÃ¨re centrale. A droite, le poste de Cafu, vieillissant mais toujours performant, est doublÃ© par Cicinho. Et Ã gauche, Roberto Carlos est toujours vert.
. Calendrier: le tirage au sort de la phase finale du Mondial aura lieu le 9 dÃ©cembre Ã Leipzig (Allemagne), six mois avant le dÃ©but de la compÃ©tition. Les modalitÃ©s de ce tirage et notamment les pays tÃªtes de sÃ©rie seront connus seulement trois jours avant, le 6 dÃ©cembre. Les internationaux seront officiellement Ã disposition de leur sÃ©lection Ã partir du 21 mai alors que le 25 mai est la date limite d'enregistrement des listes de 23 joueurs par pays. La compÃ©tition dÃ©butera le 9 juin Ã Munich. Les Ã©quipes seront tenues d'arriver en Allemagne au moins cinq jours avant leur premier match.
RÃ©sultats des barrages retour des qualifications Ã la Coupe du monde de football 2006, mercredi:
. Zone Europe:
retour
aller
Turquie - (+) Suisse
4-2
0-2
Slovaquie - (+) Espagne
1-1
1-5
(+) RÃ©publique tchÃ¨que - NorvÃ¨ge
1-0
1-0
. Zones OcÃ©anie et Amsud:
(+) Australie - Uruguay
1-0
0-1
Australie qualifiÃ©e aux tirs au but (4-2)
. Zones Asie et Concacaf:
BahreÃ¯n - (+) TrinitÃ©-et-Tobago
0-1
1-1
NDLR: les Ã©quipes prÃ©cÃ©dÃ©es du signe (+) sont qualifiÃ©es pour la phase finale en Allemagne.
La liste des 32 participants au Mondial-2006
Europe (14): Allemagne (pays organisateur), Ukraine, Pays-Bas, Pologne, Angleterre, Croatie, Italie, Portugal, SuÃ¨de, Serbie-MontÃ©nÃ©gro, France, Espagne, RÃ©publique tchÃ¨que, Suisse
AmÃ©rique du Sud (4): Argentine, BrÃ©sil, Equateur, Paraguay
Asie (4): Japon, Iran, CorÃ©e du Sud, Arabie saoudite
OcÃ©anie (1): Australie
Concacaf (4): Etats-Unis, Mexique, Costa Rica, TrinitÃ©-et-Tobago

FOOTBALL PICKS (CONTINUED)
If you actually enjoyed that, or even understood it, get the fuck out of here. This blog is not for you. Now that your souls have been cleansed, lets take a look at some games I think are worth watching..

(9) Ohio State at (17) Michigan
Ohio State can clinch a share of the Big Ten title with a win over their biggest rivals at the big house. You know, I honestly don't get it. Why the Big Ten does not have a tie breaker is beyond me. And Michigan, these assholes are like the terminator. They get their heads bashed in for the better part of a year, and they are still in position for a share of the Big Ten title and the BCS bid. Every year this seems to happen. Does Lloyd Carr have pictures of the Big Ten president getting a paw job from his neighbor's dog? In all seriousness, Michigan has improved greatly over the past weeks, and are looking to write a perfect ending to their season. But OSU arguably has the best defense in the nation, a future all american quarterback in Troy Smith, and a potent running attack. In a game like this, with 2 teams so evenly matched, it comes down to coaching. I would give the nod to Jim Tressel, and the Buckeyes steal one at the big house, 17-14.

(5) Penn State at Michigan State
You know why the sky is blue and white? C'mon, you know why. Anyway, Penn State will lock up it's first Big Ten title since 1994, and the first BCS bid when they beat the lowly Spartans 34-14. Stand up and be proud fellow Penn Staters, we can now walk down the street with dignity. We are...PENN STATE!!!

Indianapolis at Cincinati
The Colts go into Cincy as the only undefeated team in the NFL, as they take on the Bengals, the suprise team of the NFL. The "in" pick has been the Bengals, and I admit, this is a winnable game for those of you wearing orange and black. While the Colts have what seems to be a dominating defense, there are holes in the secondary that Palmer, Johnson, and Houshmin....Houshmen....Houshman.., ah fuck it, his last name is like a sound someone would make when they sneeze, while their head is stuck up their own ass. They will find holes in that secondary and will score some points. The problem is, Manning and Harrison have found each other. They are clicking, and Edgerrin James is running himself into a huge payday. A high scoring game, but I think the Colts score more, 41-37.

Philadelphia at New York Football Giants
*Sigh* I was looking at a picture today that I had taken with my Uncle. It was taken in Jacksonville, right outside the bar where we were going to watch the game. The Stadium was right in the background, perfect weather, surrounded by family and freinds, and a great (beer) buzz. So much anticipation, so much hope, only to have it ripped from us along with our hearts, ripped right out of our chests. We have been put through a whirlwind the last few months with a selfish wide receiver, an injured quarterback, and questionable play calling from a coach who thinks he is smarter than everyone else. I want that feeling back again. I need that feeling back again. Giants 27-17. *Sigh*

And now some rants:

Baseball yesterday voted in favor of tougher disciplinary actions against players that test positive for steriods. Who gives a shit? The active players who have been the cover boys for this steroid controversy all have one thing in common other than trying to find another man to stick a needle in their ass. That is, THEY HAVEN'T WON A FUCKING THING!! Barry Bonds is a selfish prick who cares more about his numbers than his teammates or winning games. If he wants to break the Babe Ruth's record, thats great. If he wants to break Hank Aaron's record, even better. You know why I feel this way? Because those worthless stats have been immortalized by a bunch of hard-ons smoking a stogey and banging on a typewriter 12 hours a day, who have morphed into these yuppie pricks you hear screaming over each other on ESPN. Last time I checked, you don't play sports to break records, you play sports to to win games. These records have been glorified and have been put ahead of winning championships. Most of these records were set in an era where the talent level was no where near what it is today. Hitting 62 home runs in today's game without the juice is impossible. Hitting 756 career homeruns without the juice is impossible. But after the '94 strike, players felt the pressure and knew baseball needed these records to be broken to survive. This whole situation has evolved out of greed. Bonds, Sosa and Palmiero were right in the middle of it then, just like they are now.

The NCAA has passed a rule banning schools with Native American names from displaying their logo during bowl, playoff, or tournament games starting in 2006. Don't get me wrong, I have nothing against Native Americans. They seem like a fun bunch of people, I would love to go out drinking with them. But Native Americans have been celebrated figures as part of our culture since the inception of this country, both by fictional stories and in our history classroom. Sports teams have taken on the Native American themes because of the qualities they represent, not to ridicule them. My biggest problem is, what will people target next? Will homosexuals demand the Green Bay Packers change their name? Will the New Jersey Devils get hate mail from church groups, or will the LA Angels get letters from Satan worshippers? Will our Scandinavian residents rise together and change the Vikings logo? (But I actually could see why!) I'm not sure how Syracuse got the name Orangemen, but that has to piss somebody off. All I'm saying is, lets stop this nonsense now before it goes to far.

That's it for this week. Remember folks, don't go through life drunk, fat and stupid.

Poker Site Review, WSOP, and some Football

2005-11-10T14:27:00.000-05:00

I signed up two nights ago at http://www.bodog.com/. To be real honest, the competition is probably the softest I have ever come across. The software was really easy to use, and the customer service answers your e-mails within 15 minutes. Also, there is an overlay on almost every tournament. I would recommend trying this site out, you are even given a 10% deposit bonus for your first deposit and subsequent reloads.

The WSOP was on ESPN Tuesday night, and it was the best show out of the whole series. “The Sheik” has to be the biggest prick on the face of this earth. When Matusow knocked him out, it was the same feeling I had when Vince Vaughn laid out that dude in the end of Wedding Crashers. Aaron Kantor is just a luckbox. That kid has no business getting as far as he has. You can tell that moron has played a $20 sittie or two on Party Poker. What can you say about Greg Raymer? I think what he has accomplished is more impressive than Harrington’s run, only because he has a bracelet to show for it. Above all us, he was a great champion, and handled himself with dignity and grace, even when he got sucked out by that fishy little jerk-off who can’t lay down a fucking hand.

A Look at This Weekend’s Games

(5)LSU @ (4)Alabama
Alabama and their top rated defense welcomes in a LSU squad that has outscored their last 2 opponents by 77 points the last two weekends. The only problem is, those games were against North Texas and…..Division IAA Appalachian State?.....ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME? What the hell was the line on that game? And do they actually have a football program, or did they play their flag football intramural team? Anyway, Alabama’s offense has been struggling, but they still boast the best defense in the nation. I’ll take ‘Bama 16-13, ROLL TIDE ROLL!!

Navy @ (7)Notre Dame
The most interesting part of this game is the 41 game winning streak Notre Dame holds in this series. There hasn’t been a one sided series like this since I beat my brother 128 straight times in Tecmo Bowl. He was handicapped and played with one hand, but hey, at least I didn’t rub it in…….oh wait, yes I did. ND 59-10.

Houston @ Indianapolis
The only question about this game is; how many touchdowns, and when will they pull the starters? The Colts should beat the Texans about as bad as Bing Crosby beat his kids. They will go home red assed and sniffling, without the speech about it hurts me worse than it hurts you, 45-13.

St. Louis @ Seattle
Who is going to fall apart first? I think Seattle has finally gotten their act together and will make a run in the NFC conference this year. Shaun Alexander is having a career year, and Matt “My hat covers my huge bald spot” Hasslebeck has really found a good rhythm with Joe Jurevicious. St. Louis does get Marc Bulger, Torry Holt, Isaac Bruce, and Leonard Little back in the lineup this week. Steven Jackson shredded the Jaguars two weeks ago, and interim coach Joe Vitt has done an admirable job dealing with all the injuries and controversy. It will be a close game, as this game usually is, but I’ll have a latte and take Seattle, 27-23.

Dallas @ Philadelphia
Teee oooo, Tee o Tee o Tee oooo, Teee oooo, Teee oooo!!! That is a chant you will not hear as my beloved Philadelphia Eagles take the field against those fucking scumbags from Dallas. I think a reporter summed up the whole situation when he asked Drew Rosenhaus, “What have you done for your client other than get him kicked off the team?” His response, “Next question” But enough about T.O, if Philadelphia has any shot at saving their season, they must win Monday night, and this is a winnable game. The key to this game is whether the Birds can pressure Bledsoe into making mistakes, and you can only to that if you stop the run and put him in long third down situations. The defense has been inconsistent all year, and that has nothing to do with off the field issues. Deep down in my deepest, darkest part of my soul, I feel the Birds will lose this game and pretty much mail in the rest of the season. They have played more games that any other team in the NFL the last five years, and that has to take a toll on guys like McNabb, Dawkins, Runyan and Thomas. It makes me physically ill to say this, but Cowboys, *gulp*, 27-13. God that hurt.

Rebuy Tournament

2005-11-10T13:00:00.000-05:00

I played a $3.00 rebuy/add-on tournament on pokerstars last week and placed 246 out of around 1500 people. The rebuy period obviously was all donkey poker, I think this structure would be extremely profitable for a good tournament player who had the patience to get through the first level. I bought in three times and ended up with about 13,500 in chips, with the blinds at 100/200. There was a guy at our table with about 50,000, and the rest of the table averaged around 5,000 to 6,000. This other guy at our table was all in every single hand, was up to about 30,000, doubled up our eventual chip leader about 3 times, went broke, bought in about 20 times, and made a run with about 4 minutes left in the rebuy to finish up with 17,000. After the break, the real poker began and I came out of my shell and started playing aggressively. I was raising about 1 out of every three hands, but was only picking up blinds. I got picked off a couple times, leaving me with about 12,000 left. I pick up pocket kings 2 from the blind, and make a standard reraise. The button raises all in, and I have him covered by about 3,000. I didn’t have a great read on him, but he hadn’t played a lot of hands. I figured he put me on AJ or something, and made a play with a smaller pocket pair. I call and he turns over queens. I essentially double up, knock him out, and I am sitting with about 22,000 in chips. The chip leader was tight/ aggressive, but easy to read. The maniac actually did a good job switching gears, which made me real uncomfortable playing pots with him. He was not playing many hands, but the hands he did play he would play very aggressively, bordering sometimes on reckless. He was either outdrawing or way ahead small stacks he was putting into showdown, and at this point he was around 32,000 in chips. The chip leader had an amazing run of cards, and it seemed like he had a caller along for the ride every time during his streak. He was up to about 90,000. After going card dead I was down to about 16,000 in chips coming out of the third break, with the blinds at 1,000/2,000. The maniacs play finally caught up to him. He called a $6000 bet pre-flop bet from the chip leader in position. The flop comes 8x-5x-2x. The chip leader was first to act and bets 8,000, and the maniac calls. A jack hits the turn, and he bets out 10,000. The maniac calls for time. He is sitting at about 20,000 in chips, and a pot around 32,000. He types “it’s all in or nothing, gla” and moves all in. The chip leader calls. The maniac shows Kx8x, and the chip leader shows Queens, and knocks him out. At this point I was still hovering around 15,000 in chips. I was looking for a spot to double up and give me some breathing room. I thought I found the opportunity to do so. I was in early position, about 2 from the blind when I am dealt 88. The short stack goes all in for 8,000. He had gone all in about 4 out of the last 5 hands, so I figured he was in desperation mode. Worst case scenario, I was up against 2 over cards. However, I wanted this to be head to head. I moved all-in, hoping to accomplish just that. Everyone folds over to the blind, who is sitting at about 25,000 chips. I was praying for a fold but he calls and turns over 99. The short stack show KJos. The poker gods rub in my annihilation by tripping up the nines, and rivering the short stack a straight. With hindsight being 20/20, I think I made a mistake by making that play with so many people left to act. I had enough chips to withstand 2 more orbits, and I’m sure a better situation would have presented itself. I need to be more cognizant of my chip situation and position if I am ever going to be successful at tournament poker. I made some strides and played well, but I am still making mistakes that I really should not be making.

Almost Done with Poker and a Sports Rant

2005-10-28T13:45:00.000-04:00

I have actually plugged many leaks in my game. Looking back at hand histories I very rarely put a good portion of my chips in the pot without having the best of it. I have been bluffing at the right time, making tough, but good, laydowns, and I have been identifying the playing styles of most of the people at my table and doing my best to exploit it. I am playing the best poker of my life, and I have never lost so much playing before (Just to keep things in perspective, I am not talking about huge amounts of money. I may deposit fifty bucks a week). What usually happens is, I make it down to about the last 35%-40% of the players in a MTT. I'll find QQ or JJ in mid position, and make a standard raise (3x or 4x the blind). I am usually right around the average stack, probably around 15x to 20x the blind. I have been showing premium hands for the most part when making this raise. The bet comes down to the blinds, and I will see an all-in from the BB or SB that would have about 75% of my stack covered. My read would be, either a small pocket pair or A 10 or better. I call, and just as I suspected, he/she turns over AQ. Of course, the three outer hits the turn and severely cripples me, and the jackass goes on to place in the money.

Now don't get me wrong, this is not meant to be a bad beat story, but to make a point. My point is, PEOPLE ARE AFRAID TO PLAY POKER. Let me say that again, PEOPLE ARE AFRAID TO PLAY POKER. That is why time and time again, you see people pushing with marginal hands like AQ or AJ when they have more than enough chips to not have to gamble. They are afraid of being outplayed on the flop, and are not disciplined enough to throw it away. So, what does this mean for me? Do I just quit playing poker, or do I adjust and make one more go of it. I think I need to take one more shot. This is something that I really enjoy doing. What I am going to do is play less MTT, and focus more on sitties. And play tight, but with controlled aggression.

EDITORIAL, NFL AND NCAA PICKS AND A RANT

In case you have been living in a hole this week, Fisher DeBerry this week characterized African-American athletes, and I'm paraphrasing here, as "faster". That clip has been played at nauseum this week, with TV reporters taking this opportunity to get on their soap boxes and tell us how "insensitive and racist" this remark was. I do have one question about this situation. What was the question that he was answering? Or, did he just get done reading his injury report and opened his weekly "state of the team " speech with that remark? The national media is really good at shaping a story into something that can get ratings, hits on web sites, or sell newspapers. The way to do that is by hiding the context under which some remarks are made. While I do think his remarks may be a bit insensitive, taking into consideration the times we are living in, I find this in no way, shape or form racist. The media and our social leaders seem hell bent on pointing out our differences. If we were able to accept each other as just "human beings", not as African American, White, Chinese, Middle Eastern, etc., comments like that would not seem insensitive. As a matter of fact, there would be no need for that statement at all. But there are barriers that we all have a hand in putting up, and there will always be someone there to take advantage of that. Until we do something about that, we will be listening to this shit. I would break into "I'd like to teach the world to sing", but I forgot the words.

An now my look into this week's games:

Ohio State at Minnesota
Can A.J. Hawk stop Laurence Maroney and the potent Golden Gopher attack? That answer is contingent on which Buckeyes offense shows up on Saturday. If Ohio State can win the time of possession battle and keep their All American linebackers fresh into the fourth quarter, they should keep Maroney in check. My opinion, Maroney's Heisman hype is over, and Ohio State wins 31-14.

Purdue at Penn State
Purdue is on a slippery slope, going 0-4 in conference play. And many had them as favorites to with the Big Ten (Tsk Tsk). Even without D-Will, the Lions have shown a home run hitting offense, and their defense should make Purdue look like Morgan Ensberg with 2 men on and 2 outs. PSU rolls, 38-17.

Georgia at Florida
Florida has turned out to be the most overrated team in all of college football. Chris Leak is just having a horrible year. He is having problems with Urban Meyer's spread offense and with injuries. However they are playing at the swamp, they still have a good defense, and Georgia has Joe Tereshinski starting at QB, a career special teamer. If this game was between the hedges, I'd give Georgia the benefit of the doubt. However, an inexperienced QB making his first college start at the swamp = ass whipping. Florida 20-6.

Arizona at Dallas
Well, finally the Drew Bledsoe we all have come to know has shown himself. See what happens when you get up in this guy's grill? However, Arizona will not get to Bledsoe. He should have a good passing day, and the 'Boys roll 21-10.

Washington at NY Football Giants
When was the last time a defensive coach had to game plan for Mark Brunell? To give you an idea, lets look at the top 5 albums from that year:
1. Mariah Carey - Daydream
2. Alanis Morrisette - Jagged Little Pill
3. Janet Jackson - Design of a Decade
4. Hootie and the Blowfish - Cracked Rear View
5. Greenday - Insomniac

Damn, I forgot how much I loved Hootie. Oh, Redskins win 28-24. (Nothing i can do, I only wanna be with you...)

Kansas City at San Diego
I said last week that I think the Chargers are the second best team in the league, and I won't back off that statement. I think if they make the playoffs they will be a very dangerous team, but they need to close out games. They start this week, San Diego 24-17.

Philadelphia at Denver
I will admit, I did not expect the defensive performance that my Birds showed last week against LT and the Chargers. What concerns me in this weeks game is McNabb's conditioning while breathing in the Mile Hile air. It is imperative that Philadelphia establishes some sort of a running game against an athletic Broncos defense. They will be flying all over the place coming off that loss. Of course, that loss could press "No Mistake" Jake Plummer into making, um.., mistakes! I think the score will be lower than people think, and the Broncos will be sent well on their way to their usual mid season tail spin. Eagles 17-10.

Now some random rants:

Can we please stop with the "We've been waiting for 136 years for a World Series" bullshit!! Boston had Bill Russell, Larry Bird, and Tom Brady to comfort them through the years. As for Chicago, Phil Jackson and Michael Jordan? Enough said. Come to Philly where we have had Lenny Dykstra, Reggie White, Randall Cunningham, Eric Lindros, Allen Iverson, and Donovan McNabb to tickle our ass with a feather. Red Sox Nation and all three "real" White Sox fans can kiss my rosie red ass.

Watching the Astros offense was like watching a dog hump a coffee table, a lot of effort and no pay off, but still entertaining in a sick way. Bud Selig or Rupert Murdoch, please start that dumbass pregame show at 7pm eastern time. I understand you want the West Coast to see the game, but no one will lose sleep over not seeing Kevin Kennedy and that amazon breaking down the game, badly I might add.

The NBA starts next week, and I really couldn't care less. I am a huge basketball fan, but I am just so sick and tired of the pro game. I think the dress code is stupid. I don't care of these guys come in wearing a camouflage thong with a bazooka strapped around their shoulder. But STOP BITCHING ABOUT IT!! Is it really that hard to put on a collared shirt you assholes! Also, a memo to David Stern. Why don't you fix that shit you pawn off as basketball to the American public before you change the image of your players. Do we really need the Toronto Raptors, the Memphis Grizzlies, the Charlotte Bobcats and the New Orleans Hornets? NO, YOU DON'T!! Maybe if you get rid of these teams that nobody cares about, I don't have to watch Tony Massenberg trot off the bench for his 53rd pro team in 55 years.

I think people are too hard on Phil Hellmuth. I do understand Wil Wheatons http://wilwheaton.typepad.com/ point that Hellmuth should have a little more restraint as a 9 time bracelet winner. But more times than not, Phil's actually right. I think the poker boom is great, however you see both on the internet and in B&M games players pushing marginal hands without any thought of what the other players are holding. Last time I checked, they were playing the world championship of poker, not craps. Learn the game, pick up a fucking book, you may become a better player and *gasp* make a good laydown or two.

Thats it for today. If you need me this weekend, I'll be watching football or staring at the fucking walls. And remember, don't go through life drunk , fat and stupid. Take care.

2005-10-20T19:17:00.000-04:00

My Seven Tournament Poker Commandments and a College and Pro football preview of this weeks games.

During the normal ass kicking I take on a daily basis playing online poker, I decided last night that I will make notations about my game that I think would help me become a winning player. I understand pot odds, positional play, and hand selection. But knowing this alone does not make you a successful poker player. I read Joanne's post on Cardsquad.com, and I think something actually hit home. So with my notations last night and Joanne's article, I have come up with my "Seven Tournament Poker Commandments". Now these are not set and stone and I can make amendments, however it would take 2/3 of the senate for it to be ratified. Here it is:

1. I will not bluff for the sake of just "bluffing"

2. I will not move all-in vs. a big stack on a draw with more than 6x blind in my stack

3. I will never limp in with AA, KK, QQ, or JJ.

4. I will make a note of 1 player per hand.

5. I will always assess risk vs. reward.

6. I will consider myself good enough to lay down big hands.

7. I will not let bad beats or poor players effect my play.

I am actually going to print this out and tape it to my desk. I'll let you know how I do.

Now on to football, here are some college and pro games I think are worth watching:

Texas Tech vs Texas

Every year you see a juggernaut offense going up against a top five team, and the top 5 team makes the offensive juggernaut look like a high school team by the middle of the second quarter (i.e., Boise St. vs Georgia this year). I expect Tech to have some success on offense, but they have no one that can stop Vince Young on the other side of the ball. Nobody has dominated college football like this since Herschel Walker '79-'82. Prediction: Texas 52-24.

Penn St. vs Illinois

Okay, I know this is a shit game, but give me a break, I bleed blue and white! After getting kicked in the junk last week by Michigan and the bullshit refs (3 MORE SECONDS!!), Joe Pa puts everything back together and wins this game going away 42-17. By the way, has Illinois started a "FireRonZook.com" website yet? Stay tuned!

Pittsburgh vs Cincinnati

Interesting match-up here, with the winner having the edge for the division crown. The winner of this game will be who executes better at what they do best. Will the Steelers be able to run the ball against an inconsistent Bengals rush defense, or will the Bengals take control of the game through the air against the less than impressive Steelers secondary? I think Chad Johnson has a coming out party and the Bengals make their move to the AFC elite with a 28-17 victory. Who Dey?

Chargers vs Eagles

This game scares the shit out of me. Offensively this is not a good matchup for the Birds. LT is in his prime and playing like a man possessed, and the Eagles linebackers couldn't cover an old lady trying to cross the street, much less Antonio Gates. However, Andy Reid has the best record in NFL history coming out of a bye (Take that Shula), I am just not sure he has the horses at this point to pull the wagon. Eagles give a game effort, however they will be outlasted 31-20. And another week of not being able to watch Sportscenter for Shag. Well, at least I have poker. Ugh.

2005-10-17T21:39:00.000-04:00

To say the least my poker play has been sub par since my fourth place finish in the paradise poker 50,000 rebuy/add-on a couple months ago. I just feel like I played a tighter game before that tourney. Right now I am seeing more flops and not playing aggressively. I think I need to start looking at my game a little closer and plug some leaks, because I have really been getting kicked in the junk lately. Plus, the influx of "new" players in the lower limit sitties I usually play does not help either. What I mean is, having 3 fish in a 10 handed game is one thing, but 6 to 7 fish is a fucking mine field. I think I need to play more positional poker and show a little more discipline. I hate playing like this.

The NFL regular season is about halfway through, and I think my Eagles are at a crossroads. Firstly, the division has gotten 10 times better. Dallas, Washington and the Giants are all playoff team imo. Plus we have San Diego here, then we go to Denver. It's a tall task, but we need to win these 2 games to have any shot at home field advantage. If I had to guess, I would say we finish up with 10 wins and a wild card spot. I really don't think it is our year. Now some random thoughts about the NFL:

1. Eli Manning may be as good as his brother. However, will the defense improve before Strahan and Barber hit a wall?
2. Is it me, or do we see the same season play out every year for the Seahawks. They struggle early, Shawn Alexander has a huge Sunday Night game and the team gets hot, come back down to earth in December, then get kicked in the junk wild card weekend?
3.Drew Bledsoe, is he done or can he still play? Just remember he showed flashes when he first got into Buffalo as well. And as much as I hate Meyshawn, I think he should be in Bledsoe's ear everytime he fumbles or throws a pick.
4.The Chargers may be the best team in the NFL next to the Colts.
5.Please tell someone on the 49ers defense that they are a 3-13 team with Smith or Rattay. Stop bitching, most of you will not be playing there next year anyway.
6.And finally, who knew the Steelers would miss Rothlisberger as much as they did? I know that Maddox didn't have Hines Ward, but do you think Big Ben would throw up that pick in OT?

2005-07-07T21:46:00.000-04:00

Mission Statement

Being that I have only been reading blogs on the internet for about a week, I'd be lying if I said I am going to be following any kind of standard format. I am writing this blog to entertain myself, and maybe one or two people that may stumble over this post. Most of my posts will be centered around my online poker play and football, with little tidbits of my life. That being said, let me just say that I am by no means a poker professional. I am in the "fish" category, however I think I may have graduated to a higher level of fish. I play mostly $5 to $20 sitties, and No Limit ring games. I would term my play as Tight aggressive, with my play leaning more towards "Tight" than "aggressive". My pre-flop play is my strength, while my play on the turn and the river is a definite weakness. By posting details of my victories and agonizing defeats (suckouts), I hope to learn a little more about my play, and maybe offer something that is lacking/working in your game. At the very least, you online sharks can follow my train of thought and maybe get a better understanding as to how morons like me play!!

Today I was primed for a prosperous poker session. I am playing at Noble Poker, and they are running a promotion for a "15,000 Jackpot" for their $5 sitties. I am sure most of you are aware of this, but just in case you aren't, if you win 5 sitties in a row, you win $15,000. If you place first or second 5 times in a row, you win $200. Nearly an impossible feat considering the minefield of retards you are playing in a low limit sittie. The $200 jackpot is more realistic, but I came into today with two straight wins. In my first sittie, I played tight during the early stages of the tourney. My thinking is because of this jackpot, the fishies will be pushing marginal hands to get them in better chip position before the blinds go up. And boy were they pushing, and sucking out almost every time. If I see one more person push all in on a gutshot draw, my fucking head will explode. Anyway, the blinds were at 30/60, and I had about $800 in chips. Action came to me in the SB with KQ sooted, with three callers and the big blind. I flopped a flush draw, all low cards. It checks around the table. I maybe played the draw a little too tight, but this has been an aggressive table, and if I did bet I thought I would be making a decision for all my chips on a draw. Next card brings the A and my nut flush. I bet 60, some moron pushes all in with A-2, and big daddy doubles up. After that I open up my play, steal some blinds and knock off some short stacks. I got heads up and we must of played for almost 20 minutes, back and forth with the chips. With the stacks about even he goes all in pre flop from the button. He was really pushing his Aces, so I felt pretty confident when I called him with my pocket 4's. He turns up 2-5 sooted, and the jerk off hits his 5 on the river. My dreams of $15,000 were dashed, and I placed fifth in the next sittie to knock me out of contention for the $200. The good news is I am up $25 for the day, with a little $10 hit and run on the .50/1 No Limit table afterwards.

I won't be playing much poker because it's my birthday this weekend, and I'll be partying like a rock star. I'll have something for you possibly over the weekend, as I plan on reporting on my drunken exploits on a regular basis. Unfortunately for me, it won't be about drunken hook-ups because I get laid about as often as snow falls in Arizona. But that's the price you pay for going through life drunk, fat and stupid (RIPJohn Belushi).